just a sunday morning thought

as I lay here wondering will I ever attain that which i desire,crave, Need. If their is a god it would allow such a thing as a spirit of a women to be stuck in the body of a male. I am truly in a state of confusion as to how people can live in a world as this and believe that such a being,force or entity truly exists.and if it do's why allow such a thing as this to happen and then to place a cure,fix or a method of deliverance to it .to only put it out of such reach of most that it would make day to day life such a challenge that one going through it has to almost decide each day weather or not if its worth the challenges to continue and that most will still fail for no other reason than money.